WIFE

 “The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭18:22‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Wisely

Interceding 

Fiercely 

Extravagant 

    The cultural significance of home and family cannot fully be addressed, understood, and applied without defining, exploring and putting into practice the god given roles of husbands and wives. We are in a critical situation because we redefine or ignore God’s design. Right now our minds are all swimming in the sea of possible directions this message could go. Some of us have checked out thinking, “Here we go again!” Others are sitting on the edge of our seats with expectation thinking, “Preach it!” Let’s all just take a moment, set those thoughts aside, and allow Scripture to speak.

“Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father. Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly.” ‭‭Colossians‬ ‭3:16-19‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Marriage and family are a gift from the Lord. Women and men are opposite halves of the same coin. It requires both in submission to God and each other to make the relationship work. There is enough external pressure to crush the relationship. Unity from within is what is needed for the relationship to flourish and survive.

““Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’” And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭19:4-6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Perception is a contributing factor to the breakdown of marriages. We do not see ourselves in the roles God has given us. Husbands neglect their roles and wives abandon theirs. Nothing works without prayer and intercession.

“Lord, you poured out blessings on your land! You restored the fortunes of Israel. You forgave the guilt of your people— yes, you covered all their sins.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭85:1-2‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Women and men have differing gifts. These gifts are complementary not combative, and have the potential to form a bond that cannot be broken. But, when these gifts are misused, forced out of balance or ignored they leave an undeniable wake of destruction. To harness the synergy of these gifts, we need to identify the real enemy. 

“For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭6:12‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Husbands, to discover the treasure within your wife, show her the love that Christ has shown you. Give her the freedom to wisely intercede and be fiercely extravagant in her role. The women of Proverbs 31 can be the wife God has allowed you to find.

“Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness. She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭31:10-12, 25-27‬ ‭NLT‬‬

GIFTS

 “They distributed the gifts to all males three years old or older, regardless of their place in the genealogical records. The distribution went to all who would come to the Lord’s Temple to perform their daily duties according to their divisions. They distributed gifts to the priests who were listed by their families in the genealogical records, and to the Levites twenty years old or older who were listed according to their jobs and their divisions.” ‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭31:16-17‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Generational

Impartations

Fulfilling 

Traditional 

Servanthood

    We believe God called and equipped His servants from the beginning, but do we believe He is still giving generational gifts? Is God still calling families into specific areas of ministry? Experiencing giftedness in ministry, or believing that only certain people are called brings us into the dangerous territory of neglect. Yes, God works through families. Yes, He calls and supplies gifts for service, but being called is not an exclusive, members only club. God’s power is given to individuals when they recognize and answer His call by stepping out in faith.

“Teach these things and insist that everyone learn them. Don’t let anyone think less of you because you are young. Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity. Do not neglect the spiritual gift you received through the prophecy spoken over you when the elders of the church laid their hands on you. Give your complete attention to these matters. Throw yourself into your tasks so that everyone will see your progress.” ‭1 Timothy‬ ‭4:11-12, 14-15‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Gifts are specific to the person and to the task. We can only use the gifts we are given. In my lifetime I’ve seen spiritual gifts abused, misused, and often misunderstood. Most of these problems have been the result of people not honoring their gift and trying to manipulate the gifts given to others. We are all human. We all see how God uses others and, at times, wish we could do what they do; but God chooses our gifts. They are all meant to work in harmony through the power of His love.

“But God’s truth stands firm like a foundation stone with this inscription: “The Lord knows those who are his,” and “All who belong to the Lord must turn away from evil.” In a wealthy home some utensils are made of gold and silver, and some are made of wood and clay. The expensive utensils are used for special occasions, and the cheap ones are for everyday use. If you keep yourself pure, you will be a special utensil for honorable use. Your life will be clean, and you will be ready for the Master to use you for every good work.” 2 Timothy‬ ‭2:19-21‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    The value of the gifts we have is not something to be measured, or treasured by us. The value of any gift is in its usefulness. God grants us the abilities to employ the right gift at the proper time fulfilling His glorious outcome.

“There are different kinds of spiritual gifts, but the same Spirit is the source of them all. God works in different ways, but it is the same God who does the work in all of us. A spiritual gift is given to each of us so we can help each other.” ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭12:4, 6-7‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    In our world there are several charged words. Words that carry a negative flavor no matter how they are used. Personal politics and cultural agendas have overtaken common sense and dignity. Traditional seems to be one of those words, but tradition is not bad. Rituals are not evil. Setting up common practices in worship either draws us closer to God or drives us away from Him. The deciding factor is in the application. God is the author of order, yet He is also the source of creativity. We simply need balance in the way we serve and honor Him.

“For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.” ‭‭John‬ ‭4:24‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“So, my dear brothers and sisters, be eager to prophesy, and don’t forbid speaking in tongues. But be sure that everything is done properly and in order.” ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭14:39-40‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    The question we face on a daily basis is, “Who is being served - God or ourselves?” Servanthood should be the goal every time we use our gifts. Have you ever been to church and everything was “fine” but you left feeling empty - somehow unsatisfied? The worship team was balanced and well rehearsed. The preaching was good sound doctrine. The congregation was friendly. Still, something was missing. Did you use your gifts?

FAMILY

 “Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you.” ‭‭1 John‬ ‭2:15‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Familiar

Affectionate

Moments

Inspiring 

Loyal

Yokefellows

Today’s culture, morality, sense of right and wrong is a stark contrast to familiar memories of my childhood. We have created for ourselves a world without respect, without truth, and without God.

“You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!” ‭‭2 Timothy‬ ‭3:1-5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

There have always been problems. Evil is a reality, but it can be, and for some has already been, overcome! Families aren’t perfect. Families are created by God to demonstrate His sufficiency, grace, forgiveness, and love.

“Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically.” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:9-11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Time is a limited commodity. We only have a few years as children, a few more as parents, and fewer still as grandparents. Enjoy the moments we have. Be examples of grace, mercy, forgiveness, love, and a source of healing while there is time. Make the most of the moments we have.

“So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5:15-16‬ ‭NLT‬‬

The only way to create lasting influence on today’s culture is to rebuild the Christian family. A Hollywood version, or some idea of family that comes out of mainstream media will never inspire the Godly lifestyle that can reach beyond generational roadblocks and clear the path to salvation.

“Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” ‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭10:23-25‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Familiar, Affectionate, Moments, Inspiring, Loyal, Yokefellows - family when it is patterned according to God’s design draws people into it. God calls us into His family and desires our loyalty in worship. He assigns us to the task of inspiring loyalty in others. Families carry the yoke together, working toward a common goal. That goal is sharing the gift of life in Christ.

“Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭11:28-30‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Can we make our homes, churches, schools, and businesses a family? Only when we put God at the center!

HOME

 “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” ‭‭James‬ ‭5:16‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Honesty

Optimism

Mercy

Encouragement 

What makes a place home?

    There’s an old saying, “Only love can make a house a home.” Family living together in a shared space? The place we feel the most comfortable. The place we can be ourselves. Home - the place where secrets are nonexistent, challenges are met with optimism, failure is overcome by mercy, and dreams are encouraged.

    Think about that picture of a home for a moment: Home - the place where secrets are nonexistent, challenges are met with optimism, failure is overcome by mercy, and dreams are encouraged. If that wasn’t the home you grew up in, why not? If that wasn’t the home you grew up in, would you have liked to?

“The Lord curses the house of the wicked, but he blesses the home of the upright.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3:33‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭15:31‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    God loves us. He desires the best for us and He will fill our lives with blessing if we have the courage to be honest with Him, ourselves and others. Home is the place we first experience the benefit and blessing of honesty. I don’t know about the home you grew up in, but the home I grew up in, the home I remember was filled with the wisdom and word of God.

“The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in those who tell the truth.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭12:22‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Honesty and optimism might seem like conflicting concepts. How can we be completely honest and optimistic at the same time? After all honesty is harsh, unbending, and brutal. Optimism, on the other hand, is cheerful, upbeat, sunshine and roses in spite of the rain. They cannot coexist in the mindset of this world. However, the Christian mindset finds their balance in love.

“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13:7‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Love is optimistic. We learn to balance truth and love, reality and optimism as we grow in the likeness of Christ. 

“Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭4:14-15‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    The building blocks of a strong home are honesty, optimism, mercy, and encouragement. If these elements are not found in our homes, our families will crumble under the weight of life’s pressures. Without mercy there is no redemption. It was the mercy of God that brought us back into relationship with Him. It was our honest recognition of our sin that started us on our journey of faith; but, it is all rooted in the love God has for us. 

“The godly are directed by honesty; the wicked fall beneath their load of sin.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭11:5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Mercy is what we offer our family to help overcome the past. Forgiveness, grace, and mercy are the cords that bind us together as a family. All of us have failed in some form or another. We would all fall beneath the load of our sin. But, God at just the right time showed mercy toward us. Because of His mercy we can give encouragement to each other.

“Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” ‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭10:23-25‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    We say that we are the family of God, but what do our homes demonstrate? Are the churches we congregate in places that make people feel at home? Do we still believe, “softly and tenderly Jesus is calling…Calling oh sinner come home.”